Total Consecration: Day 10

Reading: Luke 12: 16-21

from St. Louis du Montfort: True Devotion to the Blessed Virgin Mary, #97-#98

I’ve seen enough trailers for Hoarders (well maybe parts of episodes too) to know that some people are rather crazy whenever they collect things. Clearly, the massive hoarding of things doesn’t lead to anything good, otherwise the TV show wouldn’t exist to entertain (educate?) the rest of us.  Yeah, the show tries to help these people because the obsession with collecting things has reached a “zomg this person needs help” level.

Things, and the collection of things are not necessarily a bad thing.  But when the focus and purpose of collecting things has been lost, it only leads to collecting things for the sake of collecting things.

In the spiritual life, do I hoard my blessings?  I attempt to write a grateful status and tweet every day.  Most days, it is really easy to be grateful for something…sometimes it is not.  And sometimes I feel like I’m just grateful for everything.  But do I remember for what purpose is my gratitude for?  Why do I feel blessed? Why be grateful? Am I grateful for gratitude’s sake, only?

As much as I want to control my life in every respect, I must always remember that it is God who allows me to act on my will, and God who allows gifts and blessings in my life that allow me to be grateful.

I think up until now…I’ve been hoarding my gratitude…  I’ve been grateful for many things but have neglected to remember God in my gratitude.  I’ve been grateful for gratitude’s sake rather than for God.  Maybe somewhere in my subconscious, I thought seeking a definitive moment of gratitude each day was enough to be pleasing to God, but no.  He is allowed to call me a fool for not making a sincere effort to be truly grateful in my innermost being by acknowledging Him.

The other day I mentioned I struggle with envy and resolved to work on that.  But it’s become really evident to me in the past few days since then that envy is actually quite a struggle for me. Like, whoa.  And as much as I thought that posting something that I’m grateful for each day would help with that…it really doesn’t.  My biggest envies never seem to go away.  And it’s because I stop my gratitude at gratitude…when really my gratitude needs to be focused or redirected back at God and really addressing my biggest envies.  I need to make my faith lively and resolve to not be at ease regarding my soul in dealing with envy.

So, my resolution then is to start thinking about God in my grateful posts/tweets.  Whether I mention Him or not doesn’t necessarily matter…but it should be evident that I did, in fact, keep Him in mind.  And I need a renewed focus on being grateful for the things surrounding my biggest struggles with envy.

Ad Jesum per Mariam,
– JD